The Tribe: 3×21-3×30

Ryan’s attack has given the Guardian a haircut, and, I believe, redecorated his office. Sideshow Luke Perry talks the Guardian out of killing Ryan, playing on the Guardian’s insecurity — can’t have a guy like Ryan go to meet the great and glorious Zoot before he does.
Seline breaks down and for the first time demonstrates that she actually gives a damn about him. Tyson decides that it’s time for action, not for warm thoughts. So she… writes a letter.
Sideshow Luke Perry tells Seline that he’s managed to smuggle Ryan off to safety, but she’s not to tell anyone, and he claims that he’s done this behind the Guardian’s back. Unfortunately, Ellie sees him comforting Seline and decides that Luke’s in love with her.
Edward Scissorhands is sold into slavery by the redheaded Leprechaun, but, to his shock, despite the fact that Edward Scissorhands has spent the past ten episodes warning him of this, the Chosen decide that a fair trade would be “We’ll take Pride and also the three of you as slaves.”
May smuggles an important map to the resistance, but it’s in code, which stymies our heroes until they realize that “FD” means “Fuel Dump”. And “GS” means “Gas Station”. And “Refueling Depot”. Basically, The Chosen have as many words for “Place To Get Gasoline” as the Eskimos do for Snow.
Sideshow Luke Perry finally delivers Tyson’s note to the Guardian, which just says “Do you like me? Check One: [] Yes [] No.” The Guardian checks “Yes”, and May makes googly eyes at Edward Scissorhands.
Bray, Ebony, and Lex work together to blow up the fuel depot, and in the first really just utterly moronic thing she’s ever done, Ebony lights the fuse to blow it up before Bray even makes a token attempt to exit the depot. This would be brilliant and Machiavellian, except that it’s entirely clear that she’s just, I dunno, not paying attention.
Bray escapes, of course, and they decide to booze it up in celebration, forgetting that Lex is like two days from getting his six week chip.
Sideshow Luke Perry and the Guardian are starting to do some role-reversal, as the Guardian is by this point sufficiently crazy that he doesn’t think the destruction of the fuel depot should prompt, say, going and hunting down the rebels, but rather, say, reflecting on Zoot’s deeper purpose and marveling at the wonderous miracle of Big Honking Explosions. He summons KC to interpret it, in the hopes that it’s a sign from Zoot that it’s okay for him to sleep with Tyson.
May reports Edward Scissorhands’s fate, and also that she is totally warm for his pasty form. Bray thinks that’s awesome, since it means that Pride isn’t off sexing up Amber.
“Are you there, Zoot? It’s me, Seline,” she asks, actually praying to Zoot to bring her husband back. Meanwhile, Tyson gets to seducing the Guardian, but this is cut short when the Guardian has a revelation, and names her the new Supreme Mother.
KC proposes himself as Sugar Daddy to Telly, the Leprechaun’s kid sister, which suggests to me that this term does not mean the same thing in New Zealand as it does here.
Bray, Ebony and Lex take in a Punch and Judy show about their exploits. Afterward, they rough up the puppeteers and put on their own show, which is not nearly as well written, but gets the point across.
The rebels hear about the impending coronation, and Lex pushes them to use this as a change to execute the Guardian and also whoever the new supreme mother is, who he is so sure is a self-seeking opportunist who has betrayed them, that he’s not even going to wait and find out who it is. So Bray is elected to go all Book Depository, since he knows how to use a crossbow.
KC and the redheads make commemorative T-Shirts for the coronation.
Alice bitches Seline out, she runs up a flight of steps, then falls down, and miscarries.
Lex, predictably, decides that his wife has betrayed him and is really on the side of the Guardian. Bray, unexpectedly, thinks that maybe Tyson is just playing the Guardian. Lex claims that he’ll kill the Guardian if he lays a hand on his wife, which is not much of a threat when you consider that the whole plan was for them to kill the Guardian regardless.
Ebony finally tries to comfort Lex by pointing out that he wouldn’t exactly be the poster child for monogamy, though Lex think’s that’s different, because he is a man. That’s the douchebag we’ve come to love.
May sets up a meeting between Lex and Tyson so that she can explain herself and Lex can get his end away.
Seline goes into an entirely reasonable depression over the miscarriage, and she swears Luke to secrecy about it. Because no one will notice when she never gets any more pregnant.
Tyson has a vision of Lex shooting The Guardian, which is fair, because Lex plans to shoot the Guardian. Meanwhile, the Guardian offers one of the Mallrats amnesty, and they choose Ned the Tall Leprechaun, since they want to be rid of him (KC’s got a good scam going and doesn’t like his chances on the outside; Ellie is no good in a fight, and Alice won’t leave anyone alone with Ned), but they have to trick him into thinking they’re not trying to get rid of him, so KC arrainges the most obviously rigged craps game ever. The Weasley Twins work it out, but since they don’t like their big brother all that much, they’re willing to extort KC for their silence.
Ebony and Bray fail to find Lex, mostly because he’s staked out a place near the coronation, while they’re searching everywhere else in the city.
Ned is immediately arrested for drunkenness and rabble-rousing, and ends up back at the mall.
At the coronation, the foley is off, causing the metal-on-metal sound of the Chosen’s scythes to be way out of step with their movements. Bray finds Lex, but Ebony turns on him, refusing to let Bray stop the assassination. He’s shocked, shocked to find that Ebony lied to him. Because Bray has no long-term memory.
Ebony is shocked, shocked, when Bray kicks her ass, and then rushes off to stop Lex. However, showing that can-do effectiveness he’s known for, instead of stopping Lex, Bray just spoils his aim, so that Lex shoots Tyson instead.
Later, The Guardian fires Luke, and he immediately changes into a garish neon-colored outfit, changes his hair, and changes his face painting. He also swears to stop the Guardian, but just the Guardian personally, as he still believes in The Chosen. Pride and May kidnap Brady, tell Lex that Tyson is okay, and then Amber shows up with a deprogrammed Trudy.
As Bray asserts, “This is great; it looks like it’s the beginning of the end!”
Uh… I bet that’s more upbeat in New Zealand.
May, Lex and Ebony won’t forgive Trudy, and she looks very upset that the three most morally bankrupt characters in the show are passing judgment on her.
Without Brady, the Chosen start to come off the rails, and Bray holds a meeting of tribal leaders, who are too scared to join the rebellion.
Meanwhile, at the trial of everyone the Guardian could get his hands on, Tyson convinces the Guardian that the abduction was Ordained By The Mighty Zoot, and so he releases them as instruments of Zoot, except for Luke, who confessed to save the others. Fortunately, as the Chosen desert their posts, they take him with them.
Trudy gives an impassioned speech to the tribal leaders, and Ebony for some reason tries to argue her down, but she manages to rally the troops all the same.
Amber tells Bray, because no one in this show is clever enough to work it out on their own, that she’s pregnant, and Bray immediately pisses her off by asking if it’s Edward Scissorhands’s.
As the Praetorian Guard looks for Luke, he confeses his love to Ellie and she implies hers for him.
Amber rejects the idea of actually just telling Bray that, yes, she loves him and needs him and trusts him and is not doing Pride, because as she’s having his baby, telling him how she really feels is out of the question. Even Trudy thinks that doesn’t make sense.
The Guardian is left with nothing now but his Extra Special Guard, who wear hockey helmets and have extra serrated scythes.
The Guardian has a crying fit over his lack of Guidance from Zoot, so he is naturally pleased when, in an unexpected cliffhanger, Zoot actually does appear to him….

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